Patina Consult

Is negativity settling deep inside of you? You know you can refuse to give your negativity room to grow. See your negative thoughts for what they really are – self criticism.

As a coach, one of the things I do is help clients uncover blind spots. This requires their honest reflection, which is easier said than done. It takes work. Good work. In my own life and especially right now, I am into reflecting with a lot of self-love. I am also thinking about my own blind spots, and I’m relearning that facing my life builds my confidence. To practice making choices each day that align with my values and purpose feels really good. I don’t talk about it much because it’s so very personal, but I encourage you to make choices with awareness and to live your life consciously. Enjoy your strength – you have it, no matter what seems like it’s in the way. Don’t let anything or anyone cloud your personal power. You can handle this. I now call it self responsibility.

I found a great opportunity and I want to share it. It’s about setting your bar high. It’s about getting beyond the judgment approach to life (one of my favorite subjects). I can’t believe it, but I have discovered that I have been judging everything most of my life. How about you? Have you thought about this? What I can share here is that I now know that there are concrete ways to practice acceptance instead of judgment. What I like about practicing acceptance is how compassion, joy and love are a part of the learning. Acceptance gives room to evaluate what is happening. Judgment is prejudice – based. We humans are so good at judgment – everywhere. We can work on that.

I am a horse person. I am so happy about that. My understanding of impulse comes from horses. They teach me how to tap my potential and that I have the power to nourish and enrich others. You do not have to have money to be around horses. Let me say it again. You do not have to be financially privileged to experience an equine. Find someone to get you close to them. Yes, it costs money to own and care for horses on your own, but lean into your creativity, and you will find a way to meet them. They are surprisingly cooperative big animals, and we can learn so much from them. Like where we are in our self-esteem. The ways we are threatened.  The ways we then try to draw out disagreements with each other. Our addiction to control.

Horses seem more interested in what it means to be equals. They appreciate mutual respect. And you can’t fool them.

From horses, I have learned to develop my own vision of what life can be without being ridiculously optimistic or pessimistic. I want the same for you. I don’t care who you are. Neither does the horse.

It’s a perfect moment for contribution. There must be something you can lean into. What is it? What if you stopped hesitating? What if you stopped holding back?

It is really hard to lead when you are habitually pessimistic. If you want to lead in your role in business, in your family, in your relationships, or maybe in your community, if that is really important to you, if there is something you want to get done, you may want to look at who you are being in the world. I think pessimism is a habit. You can change it. It just takes a little time.

If you stop for a few minutes and really think about it, you can see that you are 100% responsible for your attitudes. Now that, is freedom. It’s powerful. Don’t give your power away, and please, don’t convince yourself that you have already lost it.

I am curious about how much of what we are thinking is inherited. How much of it is pure ego, evaluating everyone and everything with all kinds of filters? When exploring this thought, I get really excited about what could come from a family Mastermind group. It would be so useful if you have a family that is trying to work together in philanthropy. But even if you don’t, imagine exploring together some of the mental bias you’ve been harboring about each other. What a radical shift you could make in your relationships. It takes courage to pursue acceptance in a most positive way, acceptance instead of judgement. In fact, it would be great for a family, however you describe your family, to get really courageous and to forgive each other for judgements. Or if not each other, just yourself…I dare you.